Apparently every single problem that we have with anything, anywhere in this country, is not caused by stupid people, but by alcohol. I wish people would take some responsibility for their own actions for once.

Hey, you! If you enjoy more than 2 standard drinks a day, YOU ARE  BAD BINGE DRINKERS AND ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL OF OUR SOCIAL PROBLEMS!

Plenty of people are dickheads before the consumption of alcohol. Maybe someone should tell the politicians that. If I want a 6 pack of beer during the week I’m going to have it, and the repercussions (hungover, tired, late for work) are my problem. I shouldn’t have to be told over-drinking is a problem, I already know that from experience.

But this brings us to a new point: some people just shouldn’t drink!

There’s a reason kids from certain countries in Europe don’t have the ‘binge drinking epidemic’. It is customary and normal in some places to let kids have a glass of wine with their dinner from a very early age. I think this approach can show children from an early age what alcohol does to people, and instil in them a certain level of responsibility.

Instead of waiting until they turn 18 and just handing them the keys to the castle, these societies actually teach by showing. Maybe instead of screaming at teenagers not to drink, we should encourage them from a younger age to be responsible. But I digress;

Coming from a hospitality background, I know quite a few alcoholics. Staff and patrons. Whether they are ready to admit to it or not doesn’t matter, they are alcoholics regardless.

Lots of hospitality people are very unhappy with their line of employment, so it’s unsurprising that some might be so miserable that they’ll go home and get drunk every night. This probably points to deeper psychological issues but what am I, a psychologist?

I also think there’s a very strong link between bogans and alcohol fuelled violence, but who’s going to offend such a large majority of losers by telling them they are just bad people with bad upbringings. Okay that last description was a little bit overboard, but who else would go to a football game, drink rum all day and night, then get in a fight? Yes, you, the guy in the Bundaberg Rum shirt that’s been yelling bogan shit I don’t care about all night.

I’m tired of hearing about “the teenage binge drinking problem”, because it’s not a fucking problem. The recent tax on mixed drinks has not done one single thing to stop the ‘problem’ – it only enhanced it because the same kids will buy a bottle for a few dollars more and drink the entire thing in one night. Before the tax it would have just been a 6-pack.

Now they’re pouring bigger drinks, with more ‘standard drinks’ in them.

Don’t even get me started on the cancer link with alcohol. Everything ever gives you cancer, so people should just get used to the fact they will die. And that death is probably going to be caused by something man made. It’s inevitable!

So until people start being accountable for their own actions we’re going to have politicians telling us that we have a serious drinking problem. Meanwhile government coffers will be getting fatter from higher taxes, and I’m sure they won’t give a shit about that. Right?