Idiots lining up waiting for the new iPhone in Sydney.

Life is all about waiting – even before you’re conceived. Your parents wait the nine months until your birth, they wait for you to finally be at an age old enough to fob you off to someone else, they wait for you to get out of their house and they wait for you to get your financial independence. Then you slowly wait for them to die. Well not really, unless you hate your parents, but I digress;

In our everyday lives, waiting is an hourly occurrence. You have to wait in traffic, wait in a queue at some bar, wait for the train, wait wait wait. I dunno about you people but I’m over it.

I especially hate artificial and arbitrary waiting times like those of release dates on any product. At the same time I do love it when retailers break street date, because it means less waiting! Most Some would say this makes me really impatient, but I’m okay with that. If it wasn’t for me being impatient, shit just wouldn’t get done by anyone ever.

Just look at any major issue in this country. Asylum seekers being a pain in the ass? Just drop anchor off the coast of Indonesia and forget about it until said government starts hassling you. Notorious road blind spot? Just wait until people start dying and watch what happens. It’s very cynical, but in this country it’s a fact that someone has to die before an issue gets looked at seriously. And even then you have to fucking wait for that to happen! It’s a really morbid thought that you have to wait for someone to die.

“Asylum seeker problem? What asylum seeker problem?” – Australian Government 2009(-2015…)

Waiting is just another of life’s games. It’s a game to see how far you can push peoples patience before they start getting angry. Like that time I had to sit 15 minutes in a supermarket waiting for a cash out because the lovely cashier didn’t actually have the money in her till, and had to wait for some other idiot who promptly forgot, to bring it over.

By the end of that I was fairly annoyed as you can imagine, but I don’t think I was rude at any stage during. The fact I didn’t audibly get pissed off like a guaranteed contingent of bogan that attends said chain supermarket, meant I won the waiting game. As soon as you let it get to you, “they” win. Whoever ‘they’ are.

I sometimes wish life was some sort of utopia where you never had to wait for anything. Roads clear for miles, bar attendants waiting for you instead of the reverse, no waiting for public transport, no waiting for shitty frivolous products to be released, no waiting! Wouldn’t it be glorious!

My mindset is probably brought on by the “now now now!” conditioning that I’ve been exposed to through fast internet and knowing about everything as or before it happens because of it. It’s the whole culture of instant updates, instant messaging and instant coffee. People need material possessions and instant updates on their friends lives 24 hours a day!

Some would say I should just relax, but I deserve everything right now too don’t I?